How Much Money Should I Give My Husband?
Question:
“My husband works, and I am on a senior pension. How much of my money should I provide my husband to help out with the bills. Right now, I pay for my computer and cell phone, provide my own clothing and personal items as well as car insurance. We normally share the cost for entertainment. I receive close to $1,300 a month. What portion of this would be fair to give my husband?”
Answer:
I have a few red flags going up in my mind. I am seeing the word “my” quite a bit in your question. My understanding of marriage is that 2 people become 1 in the eyes of God. This typically means that my house becomes our house, my car becomes our car, and my body and mind also become ours (Geneses 2:24). If this does not become a reality, then you are just living in an exalted roommate situation. So, first and foremost, I would visit that first and examine if you are moving together as a couple or are you just two people that are living together, yet living separate lives.
Secondly, we do have to take a few things into consideration here. Is your husband awful with money? Does he blow it as fast as he makes it? Is he lazy? Would giving him access to your money just enable some negative behaviors in his life? I believe that two people need to move together as one, but if the other will abuse your kindness to the point that he could destroy the financial integrity of your home, then you may need to draw a line in the sand and show some tough love while showing all respect toward your man.
I am not a financial advisor, but I would say that you and your husband should consider the principles that I have laid down and discuss this matter using what we call the Rules of Engagement. You can learn more about these in our Audio Cd Series called How to Break the cycle of Resentment and Anger in Marriage. Click Here for Ordering Information.
It is more than appropriate for you to contribute toward the needs of the home, but without knowing more facts, it is hard to give even an educated guess.
Watch this Short Video to See if Your Marriage May be Caught in the Cycle of Resentment and Anger
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Answer submitted by Christian Marriage Speaker and Coach, Dr. Raymond Force
